Pacified

Long Beach, California.

I wish I could transport every one of you to a series of incredible moments I had while kayaking Monday with my friend Paul.

What began as an introductory kayaking excursion through the Naples canals led to a breathtaking, yes breathtaking, exploration of the Pacific Ocean!! In case you don't remember from that high school history class, the ocean was first given its name, which means "peaceful" in 1520 by the Portuguese navigator Ferdinand Magellan.

Paul is an experienced (at least more-experienced-than-me) kayaker. Earlier this year he went on an exploratory expedition of the Amazonian interior with a group of his friends. To prepare for that trip, he had to figure out how to use a kayak.

Thankfully, Paul was my instructor, because as we pushed our kayaks into the water and began paddling, my arms were getting sore after a few strokes! Paul looked back, saw what I was doing, and proceeded to demonstrate how to sit in the kayak, how to hold the paddle, how to push instead of pull, and how deep to put the paddle into the water. It took some practice, but after 30-45 minutes I felt like I was getting in a groove.

We had originally planned to use Monday's kayaking as an introductory course for me, in preparation for an excursion to Laguna Beach later this week. But as we paddled through the Naples canals we rounded a corner and there it was - the Pacific! It was breathtaking. Less than a mile of paddling would take us out of the canal, past the rock barriers, and put us at the mercy of the ocean's swells.

Well, we couldn't resist. We paddled forward, taking in the beauty, feeling the increasing force of the swells. My kayak surged up, then back down again. Paul had told me that I would feel the power of the ocean when we entered it.

Exhiliration. That best describes the sensation as we moved past the rock barrier and paddled into the vast horizon of seemingly endless water. We continued out for a small distance and then sat back to let the ocean take us.

Ahhhh!

Somehow, the world felt right while floating on that small piece of plastic on top of the largest body of water in the world. All my problems began to seem smaller, less overwhelming, and only a small part of a much larger picture. A much larger picture: excluding adjacent seas, the Pacific Ocean represents 45.9% of the world's oceans and covers 64,186,000 miles² in area! That's amazing! The average depth is over two miles - 12,925 feet! Across its greatest length it measures almost 11,000 miles! And I was being moved along by this magnificent force. Wow!

Paul and I continued to float and I felt, well, pacified. At least, until I saw guys paddling their surfboards out to where we were drifting. Now, there is only one reason they would paddle so far out, and it wasn't to talk to us:). The waves had begun to break farther and farther away from the shore - closer and closer to where we were! While riding waves with kayaks sounds exhilirating (we're actually going to ride waves at Laguna Beach), these waves were heading right into the rocks! Only a skilled surfer could ditch the waves at the right time.

Being neither a skilled surfer nor a skilled kayaker, I requested that we paddle away from the breaking waves.

But I will always remember the absolute serenity of those moments of being lifted up and dropped down by one of the most powerful forces on earth.

I am now thinking about the most powerful force, who is not simply a force but the being we call God: He who reveals Himself through the restrained strength of the Pacific and all of nature, through the words we call Scripture, through the Nazarene, through the church, and by that which speaks to us but is not us - His Spirit. And I am finding that when I trust Him with my life, I am truly pacified.

Unentitled Beggars

As you may know, I've been reading Under the Overpass (2005, Multnomah Press) by Mike Yankoski. This quote stood out in the D.C. section where he documents his homelessness in the nation's capital:

"In his book The Ragamuffin Gospel, Brennan Manning writes, 'We are all equally privileged but unentitled beggars at the door of God's mercy" (62).

I love the juxtaposition of privilege and unentitlement. We are privileged even to be allowed at the door. We have no rights, no entitlements. It is God's mercy that draws us to His door and His mercy that greets us and satisfies us when we arrive.

See more quotes from Under the Overpass at http://bibliosblog.blogspot.com/

Meet the Author...

Check out these thoughts about the transaction between reader and writer: http://bibliosblog.blogspot.com/2005/07/george-muller-ch-3.html

Anticipation...

Recently, I ordered an iPAQ from costco.com, after weeks of researching PDAs and finding one that had all the features/tools I was looking for at the right price. Costco.com has a feature that allows you to check your order/shipping status as often as you like. Well, I've been checking my order status at least twice a day, hoping that there would be a shipping miracle and I would get my iPAQ earlier than expected. But every time I checked, the status remained the same: "Delivery date: July 7".

Now, yesterday was July 7 and like a little kid I was excited when I awoke because I knew that my new toy (I mean, tool:)) would soon be in my hands.

The only problem is that the UPS delivery in our area seems sporadic and you never know when they're going to show up. I needed to sign for the package, so I had to be around. That being said, I didn't trust that the delivery man wouldn't just set the box out to be rained on or stolen.

So, after a ministry mentoring meeting in the morning, I came home to read, write, etc., in a place where I could see when the UPS truck pulled up. I even made conscious decisions not to run some errands so I would be available.

I waited all day, and even though I was busy with other things, my eyes kept going back to the windows and my ears kept listening for the sound of the delivery man opening our gate. I was really excited and I wasn't about to go somewhere or do something that might keep me from getting my package.

Around 4 o'clock, after checking the order status 27 times, I was getting a bit perturbed at UPS. I mean, don't they have any consideration for my time? Didn't they know I had to leave by 5:30 for our softball game? Do they even deliver packages after 5?

5 o'clock rolled around, then 5:30 and I had to leave for the softball game. I even waited in my car, looking down the street for that brown truck, but nothing! Just in case the delivery man came to the house, I left a plastic sack by our mailbox in which he could put the package, especially since we were expecting a downpour.

Well, we got a downpour and played softball through the storm at the base of the Washington monument - amazing venue!!!!

The whole ride home I was thinking about...yep, that stupid iPAQ, and it was all I could do not to run to our mailbox. Instead of finding a box, though, I found an "InfoNotice" left by UPS informing me that I missed the delivery!!! I was ticked. I mean, I had done everything I could to be there when they came, but I missed them and would have to wait another day, going through the same anticipation.

As I was trying to get to sleep last night, I thought of how earnest and prepared I was, and all for an electronic device. A question leaped into my consciousness: "Are you anticipating My coming?" My quick reply was an honest, "No." In fact, I don't remember the last time I thought about the fact that this earth is temporal, that these bodies are temporal, that all I see is temporal. Another question interrupted my thoughts, "Are you ready to meet me?" Again, my answer was an honest, "No."

I have spent the hours since that brief conversation thinking about what I have invested in that has drawn me away from my Lord. Why am I anticipating the wrong things? I have some answers, not all of them, but enough to get started: 1) I haven't been spending time communing with Christ; 2) I have not been spending time praying; 3) I haven't been reading the scriptures. In general, I have been very undisciplined spiritually, and I am seeing the effects in my spiritual life, which is interconnected with the holistic me, whether or not I like that fact.

I want to anticipate the Lord like I anticipate getting my iPAQ. I don't. Not yet, at least. Such anticipation doesn't come from trying to manufacture feelings, but from doing the things that lead to such feelings: spiritual disciplines. My excitement for my iPAQ increased greatly as I researched the field and found just the right one. I want to research God with the earnestness that I research other things in this life.

And I want to be ready when He comes. I want to have the light on and I want to be awake, full of anticipation!!

Dead Squirrel Removed

In an effort to educate the public about proper dead squirrel removal, I have provided a brief photo documentary of yesterday's series of unfortunate events.

(Preparing for the job, bags in hand)










(Yes, the late Mr./Mrs. Squirrel)










(WalMart bag comes in handy!)










(Don't forget the Raid!)










(Waiting for trash pickup)

I've been dying too long...

"I've been dying too long." These are the words of an addict named Peter. A man who spent 30+ years of his life addicted to drugs. I think I've been dying too long, too. It's time to start living, really living. Check out my book blog for more context: http://bibliosblog.blogspot.com/ (Under the Overpass - Denver).

Dead Animal Removal

Just minutes ago, I was enjoying my time watering the plants in the front yard when something next to the fence caught my eye. I happened to be aiming the water hose in that direction and realized that I was drenching a squirrel! A squirrel that wasn't moving! Aye de mi!!!! Somehow, this squirrel didn't make it to the next tree and fell to its untimely death - dang! I mean, I was feeling really bad for this squirrel.

Then I realized that I had to figure out what to do with the squirrel. It's hot and humid in DC today, so that squirrel already has some friends helping out on the decomp process :((. Yeah, not a pretty picture and it is right by our front steps, so this squirrel is going to start stinking up the whole neighborhood.

So what do you do with a dead squirrel in the city? I'm not really afraid of touching the thing - I grew up on a farm and dealt w/ a lot of dead organisms. But dead squirrels in the city are another story. I wasn't going to bury the squirrel, and God knows that you shouldn't just throw something like that away. I mean, think about the journey that squirrel is going to go on w/ the rest of the garbage! Aye!!!

I finished watering in a hurry, then I sat down at my computer to do some google searches:
dc dead squirrel removal
dc dead squirrel
dc squirrel removal
dc dead squirrel removal?
dc dead animal removal

The last search proved to be the most fruitful and led me to Department of Public Works' Dead Animal Removal page http://dpw.dc.gov/dpw/cwp/view.asp?a=1203&q=518101.

Phew! I felt much better.

I read through Helpful Tips:

Be sure the animal is dead. (Check)
Cover the animal. (Check)
Pour bleach or ammonia to eliminate further destruction by other animals. (Check)

Things were looking good. All I had to do was call the number and request the service.

I dialed the number and immediately was connected to a customer service representative. I told her about my problem and she asked for the location. When I gave her the address, she said, "Is this a public space?"

"No. It is in our front yard."
"I'm sorry, sir, but unless the squirrel is in a public place, we can't come and get it."
"What? You mean that you're not going to come get the squirrel because it is on the wrong side of a fence?"
"Yes, sir."
"Then what should I do?"
"Well, sir, I'm not sure, but we can't help you unless the animal is on public space."
"Okay, so I'm going to go out and throw it over the fence onto the sidewalk."
"Okay, sir, as long as the squirrel is on public space. But we can't come get it if it is on private property."
"When could you pick it up?"
"Within the next 48 hours, starting tomorrow morning."

Now, I wasn't about to throw that squirrel over the fence onto the sidewalk. What a mess! It would continue to decompose just a few more feet away from the house. I imagined myself carrying the squirrel to the neighborhood park, but it just felt wrong to put a dead squirrel where kids were playing.

"Ma'm."
"Yes."
"I'm not going to throw the squirrel over the fence or move it to a public place. What else can I do?"
"Well, sir, you should just throw it away."

She said this without any sort of enthusiasm or concern.

"What?! You've got to be messing around. There's no way the city advocates people throwing dead animals away."
"Sir, that's what everyone does. It's easy. Just put the squirrel into a plastic sack and throw it in your trash container. Is there anything else I can do for you?"
"Serious? You, an employee of the DPW, are telling me to throw a dead animal in with my empty cereal boxes and used paper towels?"
"Yes, sir. If there's nothing else I can do for you, have a great day."

And that was it. And now I'm sitting here putting off the inevitable. The view from my window reveals the dead squirrel, awaiting a proper burial and something feels very wrong about just throwing him away, but I'm out of options. Plastic sack, squirrel, trash can - it's time to meet each other! Good thing it's trash day tomorrow!!

Vows

Here are the vows I made to my beauty over five years ago:

I, David, take you, Emily, as my lawfully and spiritually wedded wife
I promise to forsake all others
and cleave only to you
I promise to love
honor
comfort
and spiritually edify you
I take you from this day forth
for better or for worse
in riches and in poverty
in sickness and in health
till death do us part
I promise to pray for you
to live with you in an understanding way
to grant you honor
as a fellow heir of the grace of life
and to forgive you
as God has forgiven me
I promise to give myself to you
as Christ gave Himself for us
to fulfill my duty to you
and to be your spiritual leader
Therefore, I receive you
as God’s precious gift to me.

Today, in reading another blog, I was reminded of the power behind words, specifically behind our vows to one another. In spite of all the nonsensical chatter about "cheap talk" and the "weakness of language/words" I'm staying in the camp of word lovers!

True, we may never be as good as our words, but who says we should stop saying them and meaning them and striving toward them?

I'm inspired today to maintain the romantic zeal/ideal embedded w/in the words of our vows - words which we laboured and prayed over - in the face of a very critical culture where most marriages find their end in separation/divorce.

I think of William Faulkner who once said, "Words are my music - all that I need."

I love the music of words in this dance called life!

New Book Blog...

Okay, so maybe I'm getting carried away with blogging, but it's proving to be useful.

I've started to blog my way through books in an effort to digest more of what I read and have an orginizational system to revisit quotes/reflections. Check it out at http://bibliosblog.blogspot.com/. If you want to join in this blogging venture, I'd love to link your own book blog!

I also found a site/tool/network that allows you to blog your novel (one that you are writing or thinking about writing) w/ some helpful pacing and feedback. It's too late to register now, but you can ask them to send a reminder to register for the October session. Here are the links to the National Writing Month and to the Novel Blogging websites: http://www.nanowrimo.org/index.php ; http://nanoblogmo.blogspot.com/ . Good stuff!

Under the Overpass

Just heard about a book called Under the Overpass by Mike Yankoski. The author is a college student who spent five months of his life on the streets as a homeless person. Here's a review of this out-of-the-box book:



Under the Overpass



"Clean, comfortable, and well fed? Have a cup of coffee and a couple of cookies to hand and ready to receive a nice little blessing? Well, think again. You are likely to choke on those cookies. No nice little blessings here, but rather some big, thought-jerking lessons leading to deep, maybe even uncomfortable, convictions.

Upper-middle class college students Mike and Sam answered God's call, purchased very used back packs and sleeping bags and, for several months, joined the ranks of the homeless. This adventure was not an easy decision. Receiving much advice from Christian mentors, making sure they had prayer backing, these two guys started in Denver and by the time they hit Washington, DC, they knew what kind of hunger makes you eat out of trash cans.

With a guitar and a modicum of talent, they sang gospel music on the streets to raise a little cash. Sometimes they ate 99 cent hamburgers. How long does it take for cement to become a comfortable bed? Where do you find washing and toilet facilities when businesses chase you from theirs? Just how dirty and smelly can a human become, and how fast? How do you handle sickness, injury, rampaging feelings? Which are more predominate, Christians and churches who ignore, chase, denigrate the grungy hopeless, or those who emulate their Lord by helping them? Are there Christians in dire need out there on the streets? What does it really mean to depend on the Lord for absolutely everything? Mike Yankoski knows the answers first hand.

Not a missionary, nor a theologian, although he keeps in the Word, he shares his experiences in absolute simplicity with gritty, deep truth, never shielding us from the smells, hurts, shocks, and fears. With ruthless honesty, Mike, and Sam through him, share their homeless victories, tragedies, and despair. He compares Pharisaical Christians and Christ-like followers. He presents the homeless people they met on the streets: drug addicts, drunkards, families, couples, dog-owners, Christians, pagans, old, young. We might think of them as scum. Mike and Sam learned to know them as people, fearing some, loving many, praying for them all. Under the Overpass provides many suggestions for working with these people.

Maybe God is calling you to do something that comfortable Christians consider unusual; Under the Overpass will encourage you immensely and help you set parameters for your adventure. Whether read individually, or for discussion in a group, middle school age through adults will gain through reading this book." - Donna Eggett, Christian Book Previews.com

The Lincoln Diner Principle

Yesterday, Emily and I traveled to Gettysburg, PA and watched the reenactment of the first day of the Gettysburg battle. We didn't know we'd be seeing the reenactment when we left our place yesterday morning. In fact, we thought we were going to be helping out a friend for most of the day (near Frederick, MD) and then we were just going to cruise up to Gettysburg and take in the sites.

As it turned out, we awoke at 6:30 in the morning only to find out that the plans had changed. Our friend no longer needed us to help her, but we were up and ready. So, we decided to head to Gettysburg earlier than later.

On the way, we decided to grab some breakfast. Emily was in the mood for some "pink-box" donuts - the kind you get from the Cambodian donut shops in Long Beach, CA (where we lived for 6 years). They're pink-box donuts b/c they come in a pink box :) - for those of you who were trying to make the connection. The problem is that Maryland doesn't have pink-box donuts! We drove all over the place trying to locate those tasty treats, without success.

As much as Em was in the mood for pink-box donuts, I was ready for some wholesome McDonald's breakfast :) ! The problem is that McDonald's shuts down their breakfast menu at 10:30. After spending a good bit of time driving through the streets of Frederick to find pink-box donuts, we decided to head to Gettysburg - of course Pennsylvanians would have pink box donuts (what were we thinking? :) )

Since we wanted to eat our pink-box donuts and clog-your-artery McD's together, I had yet to get my clog-your-arteries treat, and 10:30 was fast approaching. We approached Gettysburg on Highway 15 and took the Taneytown exit, which indicated that the nearest McD's was only 3 miles away. In other words, "keep hope alive!"

Well, the McDonald's could have been 30 miles away, because it took us about an hour to get to it. And, of course, we didn't find any pink-box donuts while driving down the streets of Gettysburg. By the time we got to McDonald's we were both starving, and Emily had decided that she would join me and give up the donut quest.

As we pulled up, our clocks ticked closer and closer to 10:30 (we pulled up around 10:29!). But we had made it! Or so we thought!

We waited in the drive-thru line for awhile and picked out our favorites (if you can have a favorite McD's food item). When we got to the window to order, it was about 10:32, and the lady at the window informed us that breakfast is no longer being served. We pleaded with her, telling her we had been in line at 10:30, but she wouldn't budge.

Now what?

This was one of those moments that can make or break a day, depending on how you react/respond to it. Would we get frustrated and let it get to us? Or, would we adjust and make the best out of the situation? From the perspective of task-oriented, efficient, time-conscious folks, this day was not going well. We got up way to early on a day off, drove all over Maryland in a fruitless attempt to rescue pink-box donuts, and missed breakfast by a nanosecond!

But all of that was only to lead us to discover/define the Lincoln Diner Principle.

Instead of getting miffed and dismissing the first 4 hours of our day as worthless, we decided we didn't want to eat a McD's lunch at 10:30, and we moved out of line and headed down the road, back into the heart of Gettysburg to find another option.

We ended up at an amazing breakfast joint called The Lincoln Diner. And we made it there about 5 minutes before they stopped serving breakfast! The hostess was a motherly sweetheart to us and treated us like we were her children (not quite McD's service). And the homemade, unbelievably tasty food cost just about the same as we would have spent at McD's. Moreover, Em and I had just a great time laughing, talking, and making some sense of our morning.

We talked about how grateful we were that we didn't get to eat at McD's. Look what we would have missed? Instead of eating greasy food in the car on the go, we were sitting at a comfy, local diner eating the best breakfast in town. Things didn't turn out the way we had planned. They turned out better/different than we had planned! Our part was to trust the process and make the best of our present place and time. We had to be willing to let go of our expectations and live fully in the moment. We decided to call this the Lincoln Diner Principle: letting go of expectations and living fully in our present place and time. That means letting go of resentment, anger, regret, disappointment, etc.

While our time yesterday wasn't monumental in terms of what we did, it was monumental in terms of learning/beginning to learn a principle that can have a profound impact on the way we live our lives.

Imagine what our lives would be like if we lived fully in our present place and time. How often do we miss out on life now because we are focused on how life then didn't work out the way we wanted?

Our time in Gettysburg ended with us watching a reenactment of one of the bloodiest days in Civil War - a sobering, incredible experience, especially for a couple of people who grew up on the West Coast and only dreamed of actually seeing Gettysburg.

















Driving home, we listened to great music and took in the sunset-illuminated scenery with awe.

God, you sure are amazing!